Hi Monsters,

Cousin Critter is with me as I write this, no doubt squirming around in my belly, eagerly growing bigger and bigger with each day, excited to get into this world and meet you guys. So, this is for the whole Monster-Critter family tribe....

Some might whole-heartedly disagree with me here, so bear with me.* It's more food for thought than pearls of wisdom. I want to write to you about one little (ok, maybe it's actually pretty big) life lesson with all its challenges that will make your head spin and your heart grow, but not without the inevitable growing pains.

*(Monster-makers, please understand that I've written this with a keen awareness that it might come across as dismissive of greater evils, threats, and unspeakable heartbreaks. I'm pretty sure you'll agree that those types of situations merit much more presence, support, and discussion for understanding the utterly unfathomable than this little blog can offer. And, on that note, WELCOME HOME TO SWEET, STRONG LITTLE MAN MONSTER! I wish I could be there to help out right now, but I'm thinking about you guys lots.)*

The lesson is this: You don't have to hate anyone or anything.
Not even mushy peas or bitter brussels sprouts or beets that make you want to ralph. Who knows? You might even find you like them! (Hint: try cooking everything with bacon before you decide you don't like it).









                                                    You don't have to hate the dog next door who barks all night, who's breath wilts your mom's garden, and who steals your ball and does inappropriate things with your favorite stuffed animals. You don't even have to hate him if he growls and bites you.

You don't have to hate homework or the teachers who assign so much of it. (A little known fact is that homework actually helps your brain work better and better and better; and you're smart, so you want a brain that can keep up with you!)

You don't have to hate the class bully or the kid who always smells like dirty socks and sour milk or even the kid who picks his nose. Sometimes they're even the same person and sometimes they've got someone even meaner to them at home. Just so you know, you don't want to BE the class bully or stinky kid either. Believe me, I know. I wasn't the bully, and don't tell anyone I told you this, but I WAS the stinky kid for a minute there. Fourth grade wasn't my best year (bathing was not a priority). Nor was 7th grade (it was time to discover deodorant).

You don't have to hate the love that breaks your heart.

You don't have to hate the see-saw that breaks your arm.

You don't have to hate the mistakes you make.

You don't have to hate the person who hates you.

You don't have to hate anyone or anything.



But don't get me wrong! You can feel super angry--which gets easily confused for hate-- and hurt and betrayed and annoyed and disappointed and afraid and absolutely disgusted with someone. You don't have to like everyone. You don't even have to like anyone, but you probably will. You definitely don't have to trust everyone-- with your stuff or with your homework, and least of all with your secrets and with your heart. Anyone worth your trust will treat your secrets and your vulnerabilities tenderly. You certainly get to stay away from toxic and dangerous people who hurt you or make you feel bad or weird. Unfortunately, sometimes those people will sneak up on you. You still get to shake them off, and you'll probably use your anger and hurt as your drive to get away and to protect yourself. Good! That's what anger is for. It's kind of like getting burned. Your hand hurts when it comes in contact with the flame, so you get it out of the fire. Then, you nurse your wound until it heals and you move on, knowing how tough you've been.

But you don't have to hate anyone. Believe me, you'll be tempted plenty of times in your life, and hating will seem like the easy road, the powerful road. Regard for humanity can be a whole lot more difficult when someone you encounter acts like a flesh-eating, heart-squishing, head-spinning zombie; but practicing understanding, humility, curiosity, and safe distance (notice I said practicing, not perfecting) will keep you, yourself, from becoming a zombie like they are.

You don't want to be a zombie. Zombies smell worse than the dirty sock and sour milk kid. And they're falling apart--have you ever seen a fully intact zombie? With all it's fingers, toes, or various other appendages? I didn't think so. They also end up hurting everything and everyone who gets too close to them. So, zombies are lonely too, so they can be really good at masking their stink and hiding how they're broken. They can be really sneaky so people won't suspect anything! So, like I said, you don't want to be a zombie. Zombies don't know how to be happy. They don't know how to really live. You, choosing not to be a zombie, get to be fully alive and wonderfully you. And you ARE wonderful.


Love,
                                                                               Auntie Hatchetface